Actions speak louder than words

There exists a phenomenon we often face in our daily life. We often hear people say “Do you want me to do this,” or “Do I need to do that,” etc. But are these statements necessary for our lives? Do they really make us happy and satisfied? Let’s take an example of when someone said “do I know what my dream is” and asked “would you like it if your dream was this exact thing?” to which the answer “no I don’t know what it would be” was given. This question doesn’t even ask the question. It just creates a situation without a clear answer. In most cases, it leads us into doing something and not understanding why we actually do it. Even though doing things may have benefits, the questions are usually wrong at first glance.

The words create confusion because we hear them more from others than we realize, but the action itself seems pointless. That’s why many times we let our ideas go through the air and start living by them. And even after spending time thinking about something, we still end up acting on them as if it were the greatest idea. As one can probably guess, we let ourselves live in fear. Not all of us follow this rule and there are always ways and possibilities to avoid it. But why does it happen? Why does this behavior exist and is it important to change it? The short answer: because it’s easier to find things to do. Here is a list of some actions we do when we talk about our dreams:

You start talking about your dream every day to others. Some days you say something along with what you think would be the best idea at the moment, other days you tell people you would like to talk about it for a while and eventually decide to do it, but the process starts again. So many times we give new things to people who say “we will talk about your dream” to us. They never listen because they are afraid to tell us anything about themselves.

you start talking about yourself and others. You stop talking to everyone because someone changed their mind about your dream and didn’t get to listen to you anymore. Then, they started making things bigger than you and talking behind closed doors. Now you can hear them complaining about the way they feel about you. You will start to believe that everything you do will hurt your future.

when you stop talking about your dream and start believing that everyone has changed their minds about the same thing, you might start to forget how powerful your ability may become from such a small amount of time starting something. If you stop talking and start believing that everything happens for us, then only those who told you not to do so are getting disappointed in you. Only then will people start showing concern for you.

you start hearing people talking behind the camera. You hear lots of stories telling you that others can do it much easier than you. Then maybe you believe you are too old for everything and the story you heard. Or maybe you learned how to manage the situation to stop them and even end up getting upset because they don’t care about the fact that you are in front of a camera and talking to their audience in front of you.

you start going out and watching porn, drinking alcohol, smoking cigarettes, and sometimes other things. People start asking you to do things, asking you on dates or asking you through messages or sometimes phone calls asking if you would like to do things.

you start listening every single time you talk about your dream and then start thinking they are crazy. You stop giving advice to others and start trying to help them when they are stuck in situations we don’t even understand yet. When they get stuck and the person they are helping does not show any interest in them, you start feeling sorry for them. One day you ask a friend “what did I do wrong?” and he responds that everything you told him/her was stupid. It makes you feel bad for them, angry and sad. Your friends have no idea how hard it is to get away when you hear things that they shouldn’t hear.

you stop helping others and start focusing on yourself. When you stop helping others and start focusing on yourself, it can feel hard to move forward and do stuff. Especially if it’s something you truly want to do but you don’t know why you shouldn’t do it. Sometimes you say things to people where they have no right to do so, even if they tell you something that is not true or what you don’t know would be better for their own life.

you start comparing everyone else to you and start wondering why you aren’t as successful as them. There are different people around you, different schools of thought, and you start comparing yourself to them and others. When someone tells you it’s not possible, you try to prove it as being a victim or a hopeless fool. You’ll start comparing yourself to other people and maybe even comparing your dreams to theirs more than the person you really want to be.

you start seeing every problem with other people not as problems but as excuses and then start blaming them for it. You start blaming other people for whatever they did or did not do. For example, instead of asking for forgiveness when you know that it wasn’t the reason you didn’t ask for forgiveness before or didn’t get it at all, you choose to blame the person who did not get his/her goal at the fault.

you start thinking that you are not worthy of some success in your dreams or dreams. Instead of fighting for your dreams and working hard, you start thinking everyone gives you a pat on the back and says “how dare you” or something like that. These thoughts create insecurity, so they start turning to people who make them jealous.

you start taking credit for certain achievements as proof that you deserve them and start wondering who did or didn’t do them. You can even question why the people who did achieve these things were able to achieve them and wonder who on earth was responsible for the accomplishment. You will always wonder who could have done these things.

you start questioning everything around you, including family and friends. You start questioning how things are supposed to be this way and why others can achieve them if they are not. You start wondering whether you are not capable to reach your goals. When you know someone has achieved something, you constantly compare them and wonder if they are good enough and worthwhile.

when you start wondering why the past or what happened in previous years cannot affect your dreams, you start building resentment towards those who achieved what you wanted. You start considering yourself as having failed and not getting anything done. Because you know that you have done nothing for all that time, things started changing.

you keep trying to achieve more and more and then there are so many reasons why you weren’t able to achieve it and why you should stop. You start becoming resentful of what someone else accomplished and start thinking that you are not worthy. You start thinking you are too old, or that you’re not as smart or talented, etc. You start wishing someone else had done more or that it had been easier for you than it turned out.

you stop reading books or magazines. You always read new news or start scrolling through social media but you stopped reading books or magazines. Maybe you started sleeping less so you won’t be able to get a lot of sleep.

you start keeping track of others. You put notes on everyone’s cell phones. You put pictures into everyone’s folders. Everything else you used to keep separate from everyone’s possessions. Remember, the past is gone, so anything left is just memories.

you stop thinking that anyone can do what you try to do or that nobody wants to hear your story because even the smallest of acts of kindness can make someone remember you. You might start thinking a large part of what you do isn’t important and you might start losing motivation and start giving fewer gifts every year.

You start missing meetings with colleagues — people that you share goals with. People who aren’t aligned with your vision might start looking down on you. At work, you might start wondering if it’s okay when somebody asks you to start planning your next project or if you are not respected as you used to be. You start acting annoyed all the time and don’t talk about what you were planning on doing.

you stop thinking that you are being selfish. You start putting people above yourself. You start wondering how you are not getting what you deserve and where all the gratitude from what people do not show. You start finding faults in everyone around you. People start questioning your judgment. It’s important to remember that your judgment is very limited.

you stop thinking about your dreams and start starting dreaming of ones that you want to do next. You get used to these images and start wondering how you got on them. You start worrying about people around you and start thinking that they are following your dream. You start wondering how you know your dreams are achievable. You start imagining dreams that do not exist and start questioning them more.

you start thinking your dreams are unattainable and start waiting until you think they will feel realistic and start thinking of different ways to accomplish them. You start waiting for different things to happen so that things can go on and you can get better at them. You start doing things you love like travel and self-improvement. You keep thinking of what comes after traveling and then start fantasizing about what you could do after. 

A bad workman always blames his tools

There are a lot of people that blame their tool, or would rather do some extra steps. When I am told something like this, or my name is mentioned in connection to a job, I just say that I don’t know the term for “tool”, because I have never used one to do anything until now.

There were four years ago when there was no internet. So at the time, a lot of us had to rely on other things like television or radio, so we could listen to music, watch TV shows, and talk about our daily life. In between, there was not much else, but I am talking about computers. Nowadays there is more than one laptop a person can use at the same time and you can also find many laptops with different features on the market.

We all have our own idea of what a “tool” is and why is it important. But, I will ask myself another question: did anyone use these tools before? And I have to answer why are these tools so important, even though there is nothing about them that requires the use of them at all.

I use tools every day and, in fact, I am talking here about two very big and powerful ones: Office 365 and YouTube (I will explain what those two tools mean later). These were the two major tools at the time.

I am talking about Microsoft Word, Microsoft Excel, Skype, Dropbox, etc. The list is endless, but these are the most common products. As a rule, people blame the tools at first and then move on to using other things. However, let me tell you about the case I had to hear.

Example 1: If someone tells you about how it would be better to learn how to make a website, then he probably doesn’t know what websites, how to create a website, or even how to start your own website from scratch. What does all this need to take place? This is the example I am talking about.

If you want to know all about website development, this is your opportunity. It looks easy enough. You just go to the website builder service and get everything you need. From choosing templates to building a website completely. Of course, there is a free trial period, and if there is something you love, pay monthly or yearly for additional features that are only available for 60 days. After that, you may get access to special bonuses.

The whole thing is pretty simple, but the problem comes in the way of communication, which seems to be not good when you try to share ideas and knowledge. Some communication platforms offer messaging apps, others allow messages, and others cannot communicate at all.

Let me describe what I want to write about now. First of all, I want to give you an idea about what I do. Then you can know how I am spending my days, with the help of my smartphone. Sometimes I like sharing short pieces of my life, but usually, I just upload a video and post it on YouTube. One more feature of my phone, it allows me to keep track of my thoughts, likes, and dislikes — not only through social media but also through emails in real-time mode.

I spend almost all my time on YouTube, but this should not be confused with watching movies and reading books. Let me tell you, with YouTube, you learn how to speak English as well. We are living in the 21st century where we can speak English almost every day. Here I am giving you an idea of what I spend my days with. After you have understood me, I will continue telling you my story and how it became possible for me to meet new friends and experience true friendship. I know this sounds boring, but it is possible to change this feeling by paying attention to what I am going through. Do the best you can.

Another benefit of this platform is that we are getting closer to other countries, with whom we communicate daily. Another amazing thing about it is that you can enjoy traveling. At least, you can choose whether to travel within your country or abroad. With it, you will be able to spend more time on your vacation. That means that you can plan adventure trips with colleagues, travel guides, and even cooking classes. More people are getting interested in traveling and I believe this trend will become constant soon.

One last thing that makes it worth knowing why we want to use tools

I was talking about software. Well, let me tell you why we use software and the main reason why we always blame the tools, the definition of it, and why we are not careful about them. Why?

Sometimes, we may lose our jobs, we may lose relationships, and we may not get good results in our jobs. People blame the tools because they think we are incompetent people.

This is the type of reason people never stop blaming the tools. Well, let me remind everyone of those examples. Are we still incompetent people? Probably, I can say yes, absolutely sure.

For example, let’s imagine that you want to open a website, but let’s say that you are unable to develop it. You are losing your job and you have to start working for yourself. No one has ever trained you, and you are not sure what you need to do. They blame the tools, and then you blame yourself for being incompetent.

People always blame the tools for everything, especially when they know nothing about them.

Why does it make sense to blame tools? There is more than one reason for it. First, we are often told that only professionals can make them perfect. Not educated professionals, but just experts. To be honest, these types of professions (like programmers, designers, marketers, doctors, and engineers) were once called such.

So let me clarify. Don’t we need experts in certain fields? Definitely. Yet, we need them so little, that we are satisfied with what we receive.

Let’s see how people blame something while they are unsure of themselves. For instance, if one day at school, you did not know a word. You asked your teacher to teach you a word. He replied, “Do you know the word?” and you answered, “No idea, I don’t know!”.

At school, it is normal practice to feel helpless every time and try to teach your students. How can you expect them to understand something that nobody knows?

This is why humans try to blame tools constantly. Maybe if we had to learn not to be incompetent, we would not be using the tools we do today.

Sometimes we just need to break down a task and understand its components to be perfectly competent and talented. Only this is why sometimes we want to blame the tools for what we are not capable of doing and what we do know how to do.

I am going to show you an example. Imagine that you want to run a business that offers medical services to patients with chronic illnesses. You want to provide quality care to those who are sick. The doctor calls you to schedule a consultation and asks that you come to him on a certain date.

You must meet the following criteria:

You are a physician and you are interested in this field.

Your skills are excellent. No other physician says this.

You are willing to work at least 40 hours a week.

You have a degree from any university.

Your educational background must be recognized and accredited by a hospital or organization. If you are already qualified, that is great. Please share it when it is your chance.

I have created a small sample of an appointment that you can simply copy and paste into your calendar. If it gets in your email inbox, please note that you are required to leave this link and it never expires I will respond to you the moment you receive it.

You are ready to get started with your medical training. Just click this link and wait for a few minutes or hours. Next thing you know, you are going to join us via Zoom, which is really nice!

Now, what do you say if after these 3 minutes you have arrived at the clinic of Dr. Jekyll or Mister Hyde?

I don’t exactly know. All I know is that I have already made a reservation for some patients. This is a fantastic opportunity to train yourself but you are not ready for it. It is important to get the time to prepare and prepare yourself for this. And I know this is not easy either.

So that’s why many people blame tools every time. Or, “What is the meaning of everything?”, which leads you to a totally dark world of information that you can only guess. 

What are the most stressful subjects?

According to my research, there are three main types or spheres of anxiety that affect our lives. I’ve identified them as a “sense of security,” emotional safety, social support, and self-actualization.

The first category includes being vulnerable, insecure, and fearful, where we always feel threatened in our life. Being uncertain is stressful and often causes panic attacks. Not only about the physical elements on this list such as uncertainty, but also about self-esteem, happiness, and other aspects of life. To us, this experience can sometimes take an enormous toll. We’re also insecure enough not to be able to live comfortably with ourselves. Therefore, we use stress to control our own lives from others around us. As we may have mentioned, this may be in a way of trying to control other people who are controlling us. For instance, if you’re constantly at your workplace and being told by someone that you’re not good at something, your job is more stressed than it already is if they didn’t notice and will tell you so. In order for a negative situation to become less stressful, we need to go through a process we usually don’t go through, which is learning from mistakes we made and being ready to fix them. A simple example would be knowing one’s weaknesses, and then being aware of them. This knowledge gives us room to improve over time. Thus, we learn about ourselves and the world around us.

There are several other ways in which we perceive and make sense of the things around us which can be affected by anxiety, especially because fear is a hormone of stress. When we’re afraid, we try to find reasons or explanations why we shouldn’t be afraid. It’s important for us all to understand and accept that fear is part of our personality and to understand it helps others understand too. In fact, fearing for something is an emotion when it comes to anxiety because, in reality, fear is just another feeling that we all feel at times. All feelings are just something we use to survive. So, fear is an inevitable part of everyone’s life, even though we need to try to manage it in a way that makes it enjoyable.

The second category identifies being secure enough that we aren’t worried about everything else except our friends and family, and sometimes our career, our relationships, and our finances. Usually, this type of anxiety feels easier to deal with and therefore, more manageable. We’re not afraid to speak up about things that we think matter and have to be trusted by others. These thoughts are important to us whether they hold some truth or have the potential to harm us or others, but it also keeps us motivated to continue to work hard and achieve what we want. We feel safe enough to put trust in those around us to carry out what needs to be done, which helps us become stronger together and stronger individually. We feel confident not to worry about the future, which provides us with the motivation to keep going regardless of setbacks. Our sense of security helps us to cope better with stress. Self-actualization is another area of interest, related to anxiety as it relates to personal growth or building new skills that would help us to reach those goals we want to reach. There’s nothing like having fun and succeeding in our careers or in finding the career paths we love, so the sense of self-actualization is vital. Everyone should do this to grow. If we can’t achieve this, then we’ll certainly struggle emotionally along with managing stress.

The last category consists of recognizing and addressing flaws in ourselves like procrastinating, blaming ourselves for others’ faults or errors, or putting off certain responsibilities. This area is crucial to finding strengths we know we had and becoming better physically and mentally, both physically and mentally. Because it makes us feel better about ourselves, we feel well-adjusted and less stressed. We don’t just allow worries to get in the way of self-care, but rather seek solutions and accountability for ourselves. By acknowledging all of the things you don’t feel you have or learning something new about yourself, we realize we’re growing. We’re opening ourselves up to growth in every aspect of our lives. We recognize that we’re still growing in many areas of life and start to strive to improve.

These two categories identify many aspects of anxiety in modern society and provide concrete examples of each. Although it may be challenging to define what anxiety is, we do see that people are often stressed because of their emotions related to life or other factors. Whether it’s going through a challenge in their professional fields, their personal lives, or dealing with other factors outside of our control, it’s important we stop stressing out at least once a day. This doesn’t mean we’re unhappy; rather we just recognize we have to make room for ourselves to focus on making things we love. 

Education and the careers

are an important element of the job life of today’s professionals. Of course, there is a lot of information that helps us in making this decision but we can also use some basic ideas to help us avoid mistakes and make a better decisions. If you want a new career, where do you need to start? There is not enough explanation of this question for sure so let’s try and clarify what education and careers there are.

What are Education and careers? – What is education and what does it mean to work? Are these terms even used in a real sense? Well, actually no! According to official sources like the American Institutes of Health (NIH), there were 479 million people who completed their college education worldwide in 2017! Moreover, only 24% of them hold bachelor’s degrees from two-year colleges and universities. Now that’s bad news for those who have to drop out of any school because of financial problems and other reasons. But let’s remember the word “education” in the first place: it means a set amount of knowledge which is usually formal and is not something that will be a part of your everyday job. That doesn’t mean that you get to be more knowledgeable than all those other employees.

In general, there are several types of education or education and all of them fit into specific jobs. Let’s list some main ones and see what kinds of courses they cover and where are mostly used nowadays:

Graduates degree: This type of degree is very similar to a PhD. In reality, you must complete a Master’s Degree and pass all necessary exams before getting to enter that field. You have to study full time until the end of the year. It is also called vocational education level or VET. After that, you can continue working as you are doing your Master's. Some countries also call this a graduate program and not just one as well.

Note that many of your university’s diplomas, Master’s degrees are often created by different universities but most of them follow this pattern. So, if there is a problem with your university, remember that its quality matters. Even though that is not easy to understand and sometimes quite hard to finish, it will definitely help you succeed. Also, you can always ask for some kind of assistance from experts like through online certificates or professional certification. This makes your whole life much easier.

Professional certifications: Professional qualifications are some form of academic qualification that is obtained mostly by employers. At a certain point to get your degree or certificate, you should go on coursework. Here, it is possible to choose a teacher, a supervisor, and a lecturer. Usually, you can find courses on various topics such as marketing management, health care, engineering… These courses cover not only your skills but also your professional qualities or interests. They help you gain experience and connections so that you stay ready for the following jobs. I personally would recommend these courses, especially for those who are thinking about starting a profession. A good mentor for beginners is someone who can give helpful advice.

Note: One might wonder when should they begin studying all the subjects. Yes, there is a variety of options to be studied and each subject has its own criteria. For example, business and marketing can be studied at higher levels than others. However, when your career moves to another country then you should expect to start learning something new every day.

Online classes: Online learning services are perfect to learn anything from anywhere anytime in the world. If you are looking for the best way to study these types of courses, there are lots of websites where students can get lessons from instructors around the clock. It is not just for students, it works for experienced teachers also too. With that said, you don’t need to be afraid to ask for help every single time. This way, you can never be alone in your studies anymore!

Note that online courses work for both personal and professional development which I mentioned above.

What are Examples of Career Fields? – Are there types of careers that are not related to fields like Medicine and Engineering? Well, let me tell you: yes! there are! Lots of industries and companies use engineers and doctors in their work as part of their workforce. Engineers can become surgeons, pharmacists, etc. Doctors are needed everywhere. All of those people work on tasks that include designing and building things, testing and analysis and many other tasks. In short, there are plenty of professions that are based on medical and engineering, but you may get confused to know which ones actually fit into your career and who should be involved in them. This article is trying to explain the basics of the process of choosing which professional path you should choose and the possibilities it offers. So, let us start explaining these types of careers.

Engineering: Engineering is a huge industry, where thousands of companies hire engineers to design and build everything. Every company requires them as a part of their team and every job description includes these positions. Engineers make complex equipment parts and components and also build the machines or robots themselves. That’s why they are called highly experienced professionals. Besides that, it is impossible to ignore that some of them are able to create great products and services and that’s why you hear many name companies like Ford Motors, IBM, Microsoft, Apple, Volvo, BMW, Sony, LG Corporation, Fujitsu and many others use them in their factories with great success. Note, that in each business sector engineers play an important role in order to produce quality products.

This particular profession requires high and varied education and training so that you can be a successful expert in it. Many companies offer engineering schools and even online programs to teach you everything you need to know to become a competent engineer. Most public colleges also take advantage of these opportunities. Not all educational institutions are available for online programs, but they're all of them. If you want to become an engineer in future, keep reading.

Healthcare: Healthcare is becoming a really powerful profession and as such, it is growing very fast and attracting a lot of talented people with lots of money on the market. There are lots of hospitals and clinics that employ healthcare specialists that do a large portion of the treatment and research work. Doctors and nurses are required everywhere. Your doctor may do surgeries, help you heal wounds with medicine, provide you with medicines, and even prescribe medicine for yourself.

Note: Of course, you do not need to study everything there is and also a lot of doctors who go against what you know works. It is only logical that when you have to know everything to become a specialist in something you start with a broad view of the field and then narrow down your focus. Be aware that not all doctors are equal and you will not always enjoy this profession. But with some exceptions, you will be happy if your doctor is ready to answer all of your questions. If there are none, it’s ok, but take all precautionary measures anyway. Never let health risks affect your career.

Engineer/Architecture: Another branch of engineering is Architectural Engineers. Although there are a few specialized professions in this area, they share many similarities and also a few differences between those two branches. Among them are many designers, engineers, geographers, interior designers and many others. Those professionals deal in developing structures, buildings, machines and many others. From the industrial perspective, here you will see engineers. Of course, you can learn much about these professionals and even use them for your work. Just consider Google’s use of AI, which is not surprising either because of the popularity and use of the technology itself; it is being used by millions of companies. Furthermore, some companies prefer using architecture engineers especially after talking with engineers and asking them if can you use them to build a product.

Healthcare: Medical experts are quite essential to life in human and animal medicine. Their work is critical in diagnosis, cure, and rehabilitation. Healthcare is one of such professions that demand huge amounts of expertise and knowledge and require proper training. Physicians help patients with all those complications that have nothing to do with the disease itself. They are responsible for giving all those medications to make you healthy again. Additionally, they also give you medication and surgical procedures. People who work as physicians can help you grow stronger physically, mentally and emotionally. Thus, it is not surprising that healthcare is heavily regulated and there are lots of laws controlling the career of physicians as well. Check the regulations and rules carefully.

Some professions in these industries are particularly hard so it’s not surprising that in the early days, people were struggling to join them. The same applies to the automotive industry as well. Lots of companies still think about changing vehicles constantly and you need to have good skills in that field. Today’s auto engineers are very expensive to acquire but it is worth noting that it is also difficult to obtain them at times when a car is not selling that easily. Yet, this area is growing very rapidly and you will be hearing lots of complaints about them.

You should note that the biggest difference between different sectors in this matter is the lack of jobs. It’s true that lots of organizations are already hiring skilled labourers but in most cases, they get stuck with low-skilled workers. Therefore it is extremely important (and extremely hard) to maintain your education level and your training. Otherwise, you cannot blame anyone and there may be situations when employers refuse to work with you because of your low skill. Try and find ways to improve your skills and apply for open positions that you are qualified for.

Finally, we should talk about occupations that are not directly related to industries like medicine and engineering. There are so many such ones and many industries. It is impossible to mention them all without. 

The Broken Marriage

We first met when we were eighteen years old. But we never got married. We do know each other now, some of us are friends, but not really. Even when we went to work together, we rarely got anything else other than the money. When they found our relationship was over, they made sure I left everything behind. And then again, I came back home as my husband and I have never found anything else.

When we decided to get divorced, we did not talk about this. We knew that it was time for me and my husband to leave their home and that we would be moving away from both of them. We moved away one month after that. So, they gave us the keys, so we can move away in two months.

I have been gone with our son, until today, almost eight years later when I am still missing him because I could not leave with him in the second year of our divorce. Not only that, but I also am unable to see him because I have to go through another breakup and have my own children to support. To add even more insult to injury, we have never had any problems with the way they treated us. They never tried to understand why we wanted to separate and come back together. My husband wants to ask for divorce now because I always told him that I wanted to stay.

This new man will take care of all my needs and I never realized that it took a lot of effort for me to come back to him and start seeing that he could not handle things and my son's life and the expectations from him that I had. After all these years of fighting, and sometimes betraying him, he seems nothing like him. Worse than usual. It has turned into a terrible process. Because of my marriage, they are trying to do something to break up me and my child from their home.

They are constantly going to court, talking about me and him. Trying to force me to move out of his house and keep my children. Not only that there have been multiple attempts to force me not to see my son, and the latest attempt to tell me to stop dating him. I would like to say that some of them were very convincing. I understand that if you were paying for something you should stick with your partner's choices. In fact, if I ever married a boy, I never wanted to have my children until I became old. I know that is not true for every couple. However, I will never change my mind and I will continue being there until I cannot go on and make decisions anymore. That is why this story is written. To give you the facts that are true and how our relationship ended and continues to get worse.

I have said earlier, that if I ever had the opportunity to marry a boy, I would do so. But if I ever went on, I did it. My ex-husband has never ever forced me to have children yet, after having his children and raising them for the last 15 years now. And of course, I have no regrets about marrying a kid. There is nothing wrong with me marrying a younger girl anymore. And, of course, we did not have children before then.

As soon as we began getting married, we started spending a lot of time together because we needed each other. This was great, but then as time passed, we drifted apart without communication.

The first few months after we fell in love, we stayed home alone. Then we visited some of his relatives in New York City. His mother and brother were supposed to come to visit us, but they never came.

I always did not expect us to continue living like this and the reason I think why marriage does not work is not that much different. At least, in many marriages, we find out there is another woman in these relationships now. Therefore, when we end a relationship, everyone moves on and tells us about the next person in their lives who was in our previous relationship. Of course, no one tells us what is working and what is not. But what we can do is to make sure we make some changes, which will help us make something beautiful out of our current situation to the best of our ability.

I still miss my son dearly. I miss his company as well. And he is here for me every day. If I could get him and my child out of this cycle, then I will never ever regret what I did, but unfortunately, he is dead. So, let me try to remind you of us. That with love, anything is possible. Nothing has changed after I decided to go on my own journey and do what I have dreamed for myself since I got married. Love is never enough to do anything. You need to be able to get what you want regardless of where you live in the world. It doesn't matter where you are or what you are surrounded by. Everything is the same. Just you; want. That is your story. How do you decide to change your story?

We should always remember. Every piece of advice given to us is based on different circumstances and situations. Always keep on going on the path you have chosen. Your way of thinking when it comes to your relationship is the key to finding happiness again. If you have decided the path you want to follow, keep in touch with them and don't change it. Never change it. Never start following someone else again, as if you have gotten used to it. Always strive to continue leading yourself. No matter where life takes you. Never stop pushing forward. A successful relationship starts with unconditional love. It will always remain that way. Never give something up if it may be difficult at the beginning. Life moves you through and this experience teaches you a lot. Do not fight that, keep fighting it. Also, be aware of what you will face at the end of the road. You need to embrace them, forgive them, and always find ways to reconcile your ways. These experiences teach us what it means to be humble. I have been there and it never gets easier after. Don't ever forget to always take the advice from those around you and always remember that forgiveness starts with love. 

Human Rights

The United Nations human rights convention covers all people, in accordance with internationally accepted standards for the promotion of universal rights and freedoms, as well as economic, social and cultural rights. It reflects an overall approach, which focuses on the recognition of specific aspects of universal rights and freedoms, as well as its application in different societies and contexts. With respect to human rights, the UN General Assembly has adopted thirty-two additional conventions including genocide and related crimes, which cover both the international community and governments. All these UN conventions are part of an array of instruments governing general and subsidiary global human rights that have been developed in response to various regional and national human rights conventions.

Human rights are important and mandatory for all citizens but are not just limited to what is written in this document. For example, one would like to believe that there is no law that does not recognize the rights of every person in the world. But there are laws that govern the laws of nations and are made under laws and regulations that govern the laws of nations. These include the laws applied in countries where the Constitution allows or bans any form of slavery. In addition to this, there are also laws that govern torture and abuse. Many countries provide for such laws to be introduced and implemented if a country is going to join other countries in doing this. In essence, the UN human rights convention and other similar conventions define some basic principles which apply to human beings all over the world and it covers all types of human beings and protects them from physical, mental, intellectual, political and economic abuses.

In addition, Human Rights are not only intended to protect everyone from suffering pain or harm in their personal lives but also to prevent potential harm and pain caused by others. One of the primary areas of concern by the US government is the right to privacy. To explain privacy, one must look at the case of surveillance by the NSA, which is an example of surveillance done solely for security reasons. By using spy satellites to monitor and collect highly sensitive data such as telephone numbers, dates, location, financial transactions, etc., the FBI can use information gathered for criminal purposes against people or groups of individuals deemed to be threats to the nation. This might lead to widespread privacy violations which could pose serious threats to American society and the public as a whole. Privacy laws have recently become even more complicated. The Patriot Act was passed by the USA Congress to enable law enforcement agencies to monitor and track potential terrorists. A number of people have criticized the law for being too intrusive and for infringements on civil liberties. There are now attempts to have it repealed by Congress and the President, who wants a court-ordered order that prohibits the government from collecting Americans’ cell phones. If Congress passes this legislation, you will be able to identify your cell phone number from within the government database to try to trace calls going your way (not through the internet) and obtain warrants to seize it without probable cause. You can expect big fines from the Federal Bureau of Investigation and the IRS for breaching this new requirement. Not only does the amendment violate the constitutional right to privacy but it also makes it difficult for the police to conduct surveillance they deem necessary to protect the nation. In addition, it may be important for the FBI to keep logs of telephone numbers, addresses, names and locations and of course access to other critical information related to targets and victims. Thus it infringes upon the freedom of movement and privacy for millions of innocent citizens, many of whom do not wish to be identified (or do not want to be monitored). Although there are limitations in terms of privacy protections today, especially when used inappropriately, I am sure that privacy would continue to be a major issue in the future to come.

One very interesting aspect of our current society is the importance of freedom of speech. People are forced to communicate freely with each other whether that is for business or personal concerns or just sharing their thoughts and ideas with friends. While protecting themselves or others, I think that this type of communication is completely unacceptable and regrettable. This kind of communication should not be tolerated and should be regulated so that the vulnerable part of society enjoys the benefits of free speech while keeping the majority safe from the risk of violence and terrorist activity from others. Unfortunately because of this situation, we are constantly bombarded with false propaganda and misleading news aimed at us. We know that most of this propaganda is sensationalist in nature and generally designed to scare us into thinking that one or two words can make a story so much worse. In reality, there are probably a lot of cases where these kinds of stories may actually benefit the vulnerable members of society, but the message is always clear that the victim is the ‘bad actor’. As long as there is continual disinformation of this sort, we can expect more tragedies related to our own behaviour. Our media platforms continually bombard us with fake images and videos and continuously push misinformation around us. Furthermore, we have increasingly greater amounts of information about the dangers posed by terrorism and other forms of armed conflict. This information comes often through non-scientific sources, some of whom may be actors, and may go awry due to misinformation. And finally, our government is actively involved in the dissemination of this misinformation through television, radio, print, billboards, posters, billboards, magazines, posters, banners and social networks. Media is used to propagate false propaganda, as demonstrated above, and can take shape during times of war. We need independent and responsible journalism and investigation because we need to realize that most information comes through the media.

The United States government is on a mission to ensure that we can protect our families and our country from violent and terrorist attacks from a range of threats. But the danger is not restricted solely to the threat from an individual or a group of persons. When one looks at the total number of deaths recorded in U.S. history, one sees that our government has failed to respond adequately to terrorist and hate crime incidents. And of course, there are still countless instances where our military has served with distinction and we need to remember that our military has fought side by side with our civilian counterparts, from World War II to Vietnam and Korea, and yet they have failed to show up in times when it seems that it is absolutely necessary due to failures on the federal level.

However, the biggest reason why the U.S. government has failed to respond adequately is due to the refusal to act on the numerous reports of increasing acts of violence. Because we have seen our military serve alongside civilians and journalists in Syria and Iraq, there can be multiple reasons why the military has not been active in situations where it seems only prudent to be. Firstly, the military has failed to properly analyze the best way to respond to these situations and instead chose to remain mostly out of sight. Secondly, perhaps the military has never been active enough to fully determine the best ways to deal with terrorist incidents. Thirdly, if there were significant intelligence and investigative reporting done internally that would clearly indicate that the military was either unwilling or unable to act, then it would be very easy for our government to refuse to do so. Fourth, and last, our military has not done a good job in countering terrorist organizations. Even though our military is well trained to fight terrorism attacks and other mass terror incidents, our intelligence agencies have not really pursued this type of strategy, which is certainly not optimal for dealing with terrorism events. So, once again, this government has refused to act and continues to hide its inadequacies.

At present, the UN General Assembly has adopted thirty-two additional conventions which cover a broad spectrum of issues ranging from Genocide and related crimes to discrimination, racial equity, refugee, gender equality, lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender issues, and child abuse, human trafficking, and environmental degradation. Most of the Convention’s provisions apply to member states and governments in other parts of the world. However, some of the provisions are not based directly on internationally recognized standards, and as noted earlier, there are various nations and cultures that may require different interpretations of the same conventions. Yet, there are also provisions that are universally applicable, and that can be expected to be applied even in different places globally. For example, Article 1.1.a states that “Any attack, whether committed by armed forces or by non-state actors, is inconsistent with article 15, which guarantees the principle of collective security. The Security Council is required to establish and maintain appropriate measures, appropriate to the circumstances in each state and context, to deal with matters of common interest” (UN General Assembly Articles, Section 16). Since the Security Council itself is composed of representatives from all Member States, they can make policies concerning security and act independently in response to events of worldwide concern. Of course, the Security Council has also been known to make decisions that are not consistent with international norms and policies, and it would be inappropriate for the Security Council to make decisions that don’t fit its mandate. However, despite our continued refusal to cooperate with our neighbouring and friendlier democracies, we are aware that many of our closest allies are willing to work together with us and indeed we are encouraged by a variety of initiatives that are currently ongoing. The first initiative is one of mutual dialogue between the United Kingdom and the European Union at least once a year. While the UK and the EU’s position on Brexit have not been formally addressed, Prime Minister Boris Johnson said in recent months he plans to bring back control of our borders from the British government. He proposed an agreement between the two sides which would give the two signatories full sovereignty over the border management system in Northern Ireland and allow full control over its operations over the duration of the Brexit transition period. Given the amount of turmoil in Northern Ireland concerning the Brexit arrangements, this is definitely an encouraging first step in the process of maintaining peace. 

The Great Invention of Histories

What is history?

a story in which one person or group of people recount an event in time. A historical account of the events that brought about change. History can be viewed as documentation of past occurrences through documentation. In particular, each society uses history to understand the social order and its structure. Historical accounts help us learn about our past, examine its relationship with other societies and to understand the relationships surrounding us that make up our present society. Through history, we gain knowledge about ourselves, our communities and the world around us. There is also the understanding of the past and future and of how both impact one another and what makes it a “great invention” for global history. Throughout this blog post, I hope to outline some things I have learned by reading various articles and books on this concept through the years. Let’s begin!

Greatest inventions: World history

What do we use to find out about the greatest inventions and innovations in the world today? When did most of these devices come about? How long have they been around? What were their origins and where are they used? How did they become so successful? To help illustrate my point below, let’s look at a few topics I mentioned above and see if they apply to any of you.

Art — Ancient Egypt

Art is a part of ancient Egyptian religion and artistry was an important part of their life. Art and architecture of all types were often thought of highly and their work was regarded as highly important for the overall preservation of the human species. Many of these products survived until very modern times without much use by the Egyptians themselves but now the craftsmen and artists who created them are more revered than gods. They are still used today to build museums, for burial practices, and for creating jewellery. Notable examples: Tutankhamun (a sarcophagus), kouros and hieroglyphics.

Paper — prehistoric Europe

Paper is perhaps one of the oldest materials in the world, and while paper was not invented in Europe, it is believed that we inherited the practice of making and utilizing it from Neanderthals, Homo sapiens, and apes. Paper works well in both glass-making and in ceramics.

Nails — early China

The Chinese have used many things and methods of making nails since the late Paleolithic (earlier known as the Bronze Age) era. While there are certain techniques such as cutting in wood and rock to shape the desired nails, it was the 19th century that saw the development of cast nails and nail clips. These tools were essential in the construction of boats and ships, making them necessary for trade routes. Nowadays, cast nails are being utilized in a variety of industries. All over the world including car manufacturing, household cleaning, cosmetic surgery, construction, automotive, plastic production, and even on aeroplanes. This method is particularly useful for those who wear prosthetics due to the ease of manipulation. Also for dental implants, these nail clippings are sometimes cut off and replaced with new ones. On some occasions, nails are made into decorative accessories and clothing using different types of steel wire called wires. Nail clippers to hold wands or braids were used during the medieval and Renaissance periods. Today, lace crochet is popular.

Paper & aluminium – modern western nations

Paper and aluminium are two common materials found in the modern world through most of the industrial revolutions. It wasn’t until the 1800’s that aluminium began to become widely used throughout the entire world. Aluminium helped increase the speed of locomotives, shipyards, aeroplanes and trains. As is well with rail, it was originally used to create rails, then later used to convey mail when the United States began moving its mail via horse transport and steam engines. Both paper and aluminium were fundamental to almost every type of industry. Early transportation and electronics included bicycle use and radio transmission. We would get news from far away, we moved goods fast, and we were able to communicate with others. For instance, before Morse Code and electronic messaging, we sent text messages by hand and received letters from distant lands through the Postal Service. After using the telegraph to transmit the news, we quickly became dependent on communication technology. As the 20th century progressed, so did aeroplanes and automobiles in our daily lives.

Hackers — 1950s to 1970s

In the 1940s, computers and electricity were becoming ever closer to widespread availability. If you were in an office building, your computer could be connected remotely to a larger network of computers. Computers were available in homes, schools and banks to make calculations, write programs, print text or drawings, and even play games. Computer programming was beginning to become more complex and complex. With machines doing more complex tasks, programmers were becoming increasingly fascinated with ideas about computer science and artificial intelligence. By 1960, “hackers” had taken advantage of widespread, cheap information to help people make use of computing power. Hackers were hackers bent on causing trouble or just fun so they could steal computer codes, break into buildings and networks, wreak havoc on businesses and government agencies, and generally cause chaos. One famous hacker, Richard Mathew Atkinson, had already written software that allowed the FBI to track computerized victims across computer networks. His code name was Breakout, and he was dubbed the “granddaddy of hackers,” because the first program to achieve this goal, named Breakout, was developed in his garage. He was quoted asking, “Can the NSA read email, monitor telephone records and track down criminals?” This question was eventually answered. Later he released programs to spy on computer users and governments, search computers for evidence, and to crack open system vulnerabilities. Eventually, a wide variety of hacking groups emerged, including nation-states like North Korea, Cuba and Vietnam, along with private companies like Netscape Navratil, Microsoft’s Project Zero, and IBM’s Sandbox. Over time, this form of media has evolved, growing more difficult to pull off, more expensive, and less trustworthy. More advanced forms of data attacks have begun developing; malware and viruses start taking root. Ultimately, the hackers who created these threats did it to draw attention to themselves. Some of the biggest organizations hacked, stole intellectual property from corporations, corrupted elected officials, and planted false stories. Governments and individuals are also vulnerable, as evidenced by the 2008 Equifax breach, wherein thousands of confidential credit reports on millions of Americans ended up with random addresses. Security breaches in our personal and professional lives affect individuals and the government alike.

Digital Revolution — 1951–

The digital revolution started early on but took very little place in the 21st century. Digital information began entering the public sphere through the internet — the World Wide Web — as the internet was created. Though most people knew of the Internet, they didn’t know the true extent of it. Thanks to World Wide Web research, it appears that there are thousands of websites and countless ways to access them. Beginning in 1996, websites such as Yahoo, Facebook and YouTube, became prevalent. However, websites that were merely online forums for discussions did not only take hold. Rather, websites like Netflix and Amazon now provide direct links to movies, TV shows and music. Websites like LinkedIn and Google, now called the “web 2.0”, are making up content and advertising themselves almost entirely in the digital realm.

The rise of smartphones — 2010 and beyond

Smartphone phones came into existence in 2001, though actually the smartphone was produced in 2007. Smartphones were initially limited to communicating via voice contact until 2011 when Apple introduced iPads that launched the iPhone 3GS and 4G/5G into being. Since then, smart devices have changed the way consumers interact with each other and their environment. Much of the world is now moving towards using smartphones to access entertainment, send emails and texts to loved ones and interact with their surroundings. Whether this impact will continue to grow as more and more users begin purchasing smartphones for everyday activities will depend heavily upon consumers.

Social Media — 2012 and onward

Social media began with blogging, Twitter and Instagram. Social media has grown tremendously in the last few decades and continues to grow year after year. Major platforms allow us to reach each other through words, pictures, videos and other forms of media. Popular social media sites include Facebook, Skype, Snapchat, WhatsApp, Twitter, Snapchat, Tumblr, Pinterest and Instagram. Although social networks have existed for a considerable amount of time, what we consider social media today was created in 2012 with the inception of Snapchat. Unlike traditional media outlets, the likes of Snapchat make it easy to share photos and videos through stickers, GIFs and gifs. Snapchat launched the Snapchat app in June, allowing our favourite celebrities and influencers to tag other stars and share behind-the-scenes clips and video clips, giving them real-time validation and feedback from fans. Within minutes, Snapchat surpassed 250 million users, proving that social media has grown exponentially. Snapchat continues to expand its user base through advertisements that target ads related to specific demographics and encourage younger generations to join the platform. From 2017 onwards, Snapchat plans to release Snapchat Originals, further expanding the service. This is something that gives me hope for the future of mobile apps. Especially from 2020 onwards, I plan on seeing all sorts of mobile apps emerge onto the market such as Bixby, Drip Coffee and Voat.

Online Dating and dating apps — 2014 and onwards

Online dating and dating apps allow us to easily connect to a fellow individual remotely, all with no need for meetings, travel or dates. Before apps surfaced, we met up with people on television sets and in newspapers through letters. Online dating allowed us to stay distant; however, we still maintained connections, especially those